So Dan and I went to Chili's on I Drive for dinner last night. Man... only in Touristland do you have to wait for a two-top on a Monday. I was SO ready to try those new cheeseburgers they've been pimping all over the tv, with the porny lookin' bacon? Well, yeah... I got two bites in, started feeling like a "Ren & Stimpy" I saw in the wayback ("Chew!.......Chew!.......Chew!") and said, "Jeez, babe, it's like I'm trying to floss with a tendon!" Dan nearly choked with grossedoutness, so I gave him a sample. Three "CHEW!s" later, his eyes widened and he started making snorky laughing sounds, swallowed, and said, "It IS like flossing with a tendon!" and I said, "Yep. And it's not even a really baconflavored one. It's Soylent Pig."
Come to think of it, I have another bacon cheeseburger related story- can you tell I'm off my diet again? So I went to BK after work the other night, ordered my BCB and Cheezy Taters, waited 7 minutes in the drive thru (this is a longer time than it sounds like when your car is as f-ed up as mine). When the car in front of me at the window gave up and left I pulled up, waited another 3, 4 minutes. FINALLY, a dorky, normal looking dude about my own age, wearing a drivethru headset, glanced out the drive-thru window, sighed, opened the (I cannot emphasize this enough) drive-thru window, and said, "Yes?" I waited, but he just looked at me, bored. I said, "Um, if you don't mind, I'd like to pick up the food I ordered." He stared out for a moment, sighed, then poked at his touch screen about nineteen times, said, "BCB and Taters?" I said, "Yep," and he handed 'em over. I had to flap a fiver at him after the food handoff, but he looked so exhausted at the prospect of needing to render change I felt guilty for paying for, like, days. Pretty good burger, though
Come to think of it, I have another bacon cheeseburger related story- can you tell I'm off my diet again? So I went to BK after work the other night, ordered my BCB and Cheezy Taters, waited 7 minutes in the drive thru (this is a longer time than it sounds like when your car is as f-ed up as mine). When the car in front of me at the window gave up and left I pulled up, waited another 3, 4 minutes. FINALLY, a dorky, normal looking dude about my own age, wearing a drivethru headset, glanced out the drive-thru window, sighed, opened the (I cannot emphasize this enough) drive-thru window, and said, "Yes?" I waited, but he just looked at me, bored. I said, "Um, if you don't mind, I'd like to pick up the food I ordered." He stared out for a moment, sighed, then poked at his touch screen about nineteen times, said, "BCB and Taters?" I said, "Yep," and he handed 'em over. I had to flap a fiver at him after the food handoff, but he looked so exhausted at the prospect of needing to render change I felt guilty for paying for, like, days. Pretty good burger, though
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